FOMO: That fear of missing out that makes you click and how do you use it without abusing it?
You are quietly settled on your sofa, an evening promises to be peaceful... until you open Instagram. And here comes the drama: stories from your friends at a party that seemed incredible, photos of an event you didn't think of going to, an unmissable promotional offer that expires in an hour. That little bump in your stomach, that persistent feeling that others are experiencing more exciting things and that you are missing out on something essential? It's the FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out). This cognitive bias, supercharged by our hyperconnection, has become a powerful decision driver, especially in marketing and sales. Let's dissect this phenomenon together: where does it come from, how it occurs, and above all, how to integrate it (ethically and intelligently) into your strategies. Get ready, we are going to dive into the meanders of a very contemporary anxiety!
Cognitive biases are powerful tools to make the way you deliver a message to your target audience more effective and to convince them to trust you. However, it is extremely important to use them ethically. Any use of these concepts that would go against the interests of your customers would not only be dishonest but also, in the medium term, extremely harmful for your brand.
Definition and origin of fear of missing out (FOMO)
What is fear of missing out (FOMO)?
FOMO is a form of social anxiety characterized by the compulsive desire to constantly stay connected to what others are doing, and the fear of missing out on an opportunity, social experience, important information, or rewarding opportunity. It's the unpleasant feeling that others may be having experiences that are more rewarding than yours. While the feeling of wanting to “be part” is not new, it has been greatly amplified by social networks, which continuously expose us to the “best moments” (often staged) in the lives of others. The term was popularized in particular by Patrick J. McGinnis in an article for The Harbus (the student journal of Harvard Business School) in 2004, and was the subject of further academic studies, in particular by Dr. Andrew K. Przybylski.
How has fear of missing out (FOMO) been demonstrated/identified?
Contrary to biases such as social proof, demonstrated by laboratory experiments (cf. Asch), FOMO has been identified and studied primarily through observational approaches, surveys, and psychological analyses. Researchers like Andrew K. Przybylski and colleagues developed scales to measure FOMO (for example, in their 2013 article “Fear of missing out: A brief overview of conceptualization, measurement, and S=scale development” published in Computers in Human Behavior). Their work linked FOMO to lower levels of satisfaction of basic psychological needs (such as a sense of belonging, competence, and autonomy) and to greater use of social networks. It is therefore less a “demonstration” than a conceptualization and a measure of a real psychological state, exacerbated by modern technologies.
Example of fear of missing out (FOMO) used by a company (excluding marketing/direct sales)
Imagine a company that organizes its annual major seminar. Internal communication is in full swing: teasers on surprise speakers, hints at strategic announcements that will only be revealed on site, photos of the preparations for an evening that promises to be memorable. Employees who are hesitant to come, or who can't, start to feel that little bit of FOMO: fear of missing out on key career information, important networking moments, or simply the opportunity to strengthen relationships with colleagues in an informal setting. By creating an “event not to be missed,” the company uses FOMO to maximize participation and engagement, thus strengthening internal cohesion.
How do you fight the fear of missing out (FOMO)?
Fighting FOMO is a bit like taming a recalcitrant notification: it requires conscience and discipline.
- Cultivating JOMO (Joy Of Missing Out): Consciously appreciate moments of calm, disconnection, and rejoice in not steps participate in everything. Your sofa and a good book also have something to say!
- Limiting exposure: Reduce time spent on social media or turn off notifications. The less you see what others are “doing,” the less likely you are to feel left behind.
- Refocus on your priorities: What is really important for you ? Setting your own goals helps to be less influenced by the agenda of others.
- Realize that social networks are a window: People usually show the best of themselves there, rarely moments of doubt or boredom. It's not real life in all its complexity.
- Making active decisions: Choose what you want to do, rather than reacting to what you are afraid of missing.
For businesses, the idea is not to create toxic anxiety. A limited offer must correspond to a real constraint (stock, events) and not to a crude manipulation that will more frustrate than it will attract.
Applying the fear of missing out (FOMO) in marketing
Marketers love FOMO because it encourages quick action. Used with finesse, it can be formidable.
Example 1: Limited-time offers
“Flash sale: 30% off the whole site for 48 hours only!” or “Our exclusive offer ends tonight at midnight!” These messages create a sense of urgency. The consumer knows that if they don't act now, the opportunity will disappear. It's the ABC of FOMO in e-commerce, and it works because no one likes to feel like they're paying more tomorrow for something they could have gotten cheaper today.
Example 2: Indication of limited stocks or high demand
“Only 3 items left in stock!” ; “Already 15 people are viewing this page”; “In high demand: booked 5 times in the last 24 hours”. These short messages, often seen on reservation sites (Booking.com is a master at this) or e-commerce sites, suggest that the product or service is popular and may soon no longer be available. The fear of missing the last copy or the last hotel room can speed up the purchase decision.
Example 3: Ephemeral content and exclusive access
Instagram or Snapchat Stories, which disappear after 24 hours, play to the core of FOMO. Brands use them for “can't-miss” ads, live Q&A, “behind the scenes” previews. Likewise, live webinars, registrate-only product launches, or “VIP clubs” create a sense of exclusivity and the fear of missing out on information or benefits that others, “the insiders,” will have.
Applying fear of missing out (FOMO) in the sales process
In sales, especially B2B, FOMO can be used to reduce decision times and encourage engagement, but it needs to be handled even more carefully so as not to appear aggressive.
Example 1: Changing or limited pricing conditions
“This quote is valid under current conditions until the end of the term. After this period, our new rates will apply.” or “We have a budget envelope to offer this level of discount on the next 5 contracts signed this month.” This introduces a legitimate reason for the prospect not to procrastinate, without harassing them. The idea is to highlight an opportunity that has a logical time window.
Example 2: Highlighting competitive interest (tactfully)
If it is true and relevant: “Several players in your sector are in the process of adopting similar solutions to meet [such a challenge]. Those who get ahead of the curve today are creating a significant competitive advantage.” Or more directly, if the situation is appropriate: “We are in advanced discussions with two other companies of your size on this type of project, and our integration schedule for the next semester is starting to fill up.” It is not a question of inventing, but of making it clear that wait-and-see has an opportunity cost.
Example 3: Beta or “Early Adopter” programs with limited places
“We are launching a pilot program for our new feature and we are selecting 10 partner companies that will benefit from privileged support and a preferential rate. Places are limited.” This type of offering creates a feeling of exclusivity and the fear of missing out on an opportunity to pioneer, influence product development, or benefit from unique advantages that are only available to first-time participants.
The questions we get asked about fear of missing out (FOMO)
Is FOMO really a new phenomenon?
Not fundamentally. The fear of missing out on opportunities or not being part of the “group that matters” is probably as old as humanity (think of the fear of missing out on a good hunt or a bountiful harvest). What is new is the intensity and frequency with which we are exposed to it, mainly because of social networks and the hyperconnection that constantly bombard us with information about what others are doing, possessing, or experiencing.
Is FOMO always negative?
Mostly yes. It is associated with anxiety, stress, lower life satisfaction, and sometimes with impulsive or regrettable buying behaviors. However, a small amount can sometimes have a positive effect by motivating us to get out of our comfort zone, to try new things, or to take advantage of opportunities that we might have ignored. As is often the case, it's the quantity (and the intention behind its use by brands) that makes the poison.
How can brands use FOMO responsibly?
The key is authenticity and added value.
- Transparency: If an offer is limited, whether for a real reason (stocks, capacity, one-time event). Don't create false scarcity.
- Actual value: Exclusivity or urgency should be associated with a tangible benefit for the customer, not just a trick to force a hand.
- Respect: Avoid tactics that generate excessive anxiety or that target vulnerabilities. A good FOMO strategy encourages action, it does not paralyze with stress.
- Consent: Allow users to choose if they want to be notified of limited offers, for example.
In summary, FOMO is a chord in the human psyche, especially in the digital age. Understanding it allows marketers and salespeople to use it to boost engagement and accelerate decisions. But like any powerful tool, it involves a responsibility: that of not turning an incentive into an anxiety-provoking manipulation. The aim is to create positive excitement, not sterile anxiety. And you, what is the last “not to be missed” offer that made you fall in love with?
